


A Paramount Conversation

by lilydaydreams



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Coming Out, Fluff, Friendship, Gen, Male-Female Friendship, One Shot, Season/Series 04, Short One Shot, slight AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-29
Updated: 2019-12-29
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:34:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22010389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilydaydreams/pseuds/lilydaydreams
Summary: Willow has something important to share with Xander.
Relationships: Xander Harris & Willow Rosenberg
Kudos: 11





	A Paramount Conversation

**Author's Note:**

> A little one shot I wrote about a year and a half ago and published on ff.net. See end of work for my original author's note.

They sat in the little cafe, across from each other in a booth by the window. Willow stared down at her coffee, then out the window, not meeting Xander's eyes. They'd been like this for awhile, and he was starting to get a little impatient, but she'd said she needed to talk to him about something important and he didn't want to rush her.

She finally spoke, still not looking at him. "Xander, I have something to tell you."

"Why so somber, Will? Nobody died, right?" he said, trying for a little levity.

It didn't work, and her facial expression stayed just as stony as before. "No. Nothing like that."

"Good. 'Cause with living on the Hellmouth and all, you never know for sure."

That got a tiny smile out of her. "Yeah, it's nothing bad. I just..." she paused, twisting her sweater sleeves in her hands. "It's so hard for me to get it out. It took me forever to even admit it to myself."

Xander's eyes narrowed. "You're scaring me Will." His eyes widened with a revelation. "Oh. Oh God."

"What?" Willow asked, suddenly confused.

"Well, uh, damn. Did you...start having feelings for me again? I love you so much, and you're my best friend, but I'm with Anya now, and with the exception of those few times we kissed I really only see you as a friend-" His uncontrollable babbling stopped when Willow started laughing hysterically. Now it was Xander's turn to be confused. "What?"

She took a minute to compose herself, her head down on the table and her whole body shaking with laughter. "It's kind of the exact opposite of that, Xander."

Xander's eyebrows knitted together. Whatever he expected from this conversation, this was _not_ it. "Um, what's the opposite. Vamp Willow is back and ready to kill me and not be my best friend anymore? 'Cause in that case, you should probably get on with the murder and the blood sucking and all that."

Willow stared at him, realizing that he really had no idea, and the words finally came. "Xander, I'm gay."

He laughed and rolled his eyes. "Very funny, Will."

Buffy had said Xander might have a hard time with this, but Willow was prepared to give him the time it took to come around. "I'm serious. I get it if it's hard for you to accept right away, but this is who I am."

Oh. She really was serious. She had told him something important, and he'd laughed. He knew this was probably really hard for her, but he had so many _questions._ "But...what about Oz? And me? And even that weird little crush you used to have on Giles when we were younger?"

"I...I don't know, Xander," she stammered, playing with her hair nervously. "It's stuff like that that made it so hard for me to figure out."

His mouth kept talking, against the better judgment of his brain. "I mean, no offense, but are you sure? You really did love Oz, and from what Buffy's told me, you spent a lot of time pining after me in our sophomore year."

"I _told_ Buffy to never tell you about all that."

"Well, see, that's just kinda why I'm confused. Last time I checked, I still had a-" Willow coughed pointedly as he looked down at his own crotch.

"Xander, I don't know. What I felt for you was real, and so was what I felt for Oz, in some way. But all I know is I've grown up some, and at this point, I'm not really interested in boys anymore, and I've kind of fallen head over heels for-" She stopped her sentence abruptly.

"Head over heels for who?"

Willow took a deep breath and closed her eyes. "Tara. And we're kind of girlfriends now."

"Oh, uh, wow. Nice."

She smiled awkwardly. "So, yeah. That's the big secret. Buffy knows, and I'm just going to let Giles and everybody else figure it out on their own, I guess." She paused for a moment, looking thoughtful. "You know what's funny? Faith in Buffy's body figured it out way faster than my best friends did. She was pretty mean about it though, all 'Willow's not driving stick anymore' and typical bitchiness."

Xander leaned across the table and took her hand in his. "Will, I'm happy for you. And I'm glad you trusted me enough to tell me. I'm sorry I was so surprised at first. Kinda just threw me for a loop there."

"Yeah, thanks for not telling me I'm going to hell or something."

"I don't know if you've forgotten but...we're almost _in_ hell."

She laughed softly. "Yeah. You're right. You know what I mean. I wanted to tell you and Buffy earlier. I just didn't know what you guys would say or how you'd think of me."

Xander released her hand, got up suddenly, and moved across the table into the booth next to her. "Will. I can tell you one thing, absolutely for sure. Not only _are_ you my best friend, you're gonna stay that way till the end of time. You could do anything, be anything, and you'd still mean the absolute world to me.

A couple of tears rolled down Willow's cheeks, but she smiled and hugged him tight. "I love you, Xander."

"I love you too, Willow. And I always will." He paused for a second. "God, I can't believe Cordy broke up with me for making out with a lesbian."

Willow ended their embrace and pushed him away, laughing. "Xander! God, you're such an idiot."

"There we go. That's the mocking, sarcastic Will we know and love."

"Excuse me?" said an unfamiliar voice to their side. It was the waitress, finally ready to take their order. They turned to face her. "And what can I get for you? You two make such a cute couple, by the way."

Xander started to correct her, but Willow shushed him. "Thanks," she told the waitress, smirking.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: This is just my personal take on how Willow came out to Xander. We get to see the delightful awkwardness that's her coming out to Buffy on screen but this is left all to the imagination. I think Willow's sexuality (ie whether she's actually gay or bi) is a bit ambiguous on the show, although she ultimately chooses to self-identify as lesbian, so I tried to keep that consistent here and based it on my own experiences with coming out. Thanks for reading! :)


End file.
